Ashley Angel

Tue, 30 Apr 2002 22:04:37 GMT

Am I the only one who thinks the other Ashley asherangel if a fucking ASSHOLE and VERY rude? And I mean OOC, not IC.

o0o

Mon, 29 Apr 2002 16:57:28 GMT

check out muh purdy colors!!!

mkay, so i'm not gay, buh, why would it mattah?!?!?!? jeebuz

ell0

Sun, 28 Apr 2002 17:05:49 GMT

muh name ish ashley angel and i'm GAY!

yup, you heard me

MWAHAHAHAHA >.

FEH

Sat, 13 Apr 2002 23:01:09 GMT

God... I can't do anything right anymore can I? I've barely been able to sleep, practice is killing me. AND to top it all of, I'm sick. Influenza or for you people who don't know what it is... it's the Flu. When I'm freezing I sweat, when I'm hot I've got goosebumps. My whole body is so physically dead right now. Feels like I should just die now. Yet I have to go to practice. And Kirsten's last entry killed me. I feel so helpless. So pointless. But what I told her was true.... now I'm going to go crawl back in bed. Just thought I should update.

~Ash~

Ashley is very much alive.....

Wed, 10 Apr 2002 22:38:48 GMT

Ashley is going to talk in third person right now because he's one timed dumbass. Ashley has been getting his ass kicked singing and dancing everyday. Ashley doubts you people do that. Ashley's very exhausted and Ashley feels like dying half the time. Ashley has now taken over Jacob's SN CrazyRebelRocker so feel free to IM me but ask first who it is. Cause it may not always be me.... That is all, Ashley is going to crawl back in bed. Night.

~Ashley~

shoves head under the pillow maybe I should just suffocate myself...

Fri, 05 Apr 2002 03:19:34 GMT

I can't do this... I can't do this...

I'm back in Orlando, back to practice and the Mikes and Jacob are getting on my nerves once again.

It's so stressful. I fall into bed every night praying for the day when we'll have break. I think we're gonna break before tour. But I don't know.

And Kirs... god I love her so damn much. But I just don't see how this can work. I now long distance deals suck. That's why Shelli and I never worked. But then again, close ones don't either. I want this so much to work. But she's so sad and lonely there. As am I down here. I'm always so tired.

I just don't know anymore. Yes Kirs and I are still together... but...

LjKirstenDunst: So how's practice been?
CrazyRebelRocker: Okay.
LjKirstenDunst: Still tired?
CrazyRebelRocker: Yup.
LjKirstenDunst: Aww *hugs*
CrazyRebelRocker: I feel like I wanna crawl in a hole and die
LjKirstenDunst: *frowns*
LjKirstenDunst: I'm sorry
LjKirstenDunst: I wish there was something I oculd do
CrazyRebelRocker: dont worry about me
LjKirstenDunst: Yeah right
CrazyRebelRocker: seriously
LjKirstenDunst: No, I'm serious....get some rest
LjKirstenDunst: I don't want to see you tired
LjKirstenDunst: It makes me upset
CrazyRebelRocker: Thats a day in the life of me
LjKirstenDunst: *frowns*

Auto response from CrazyRebelRocker: brb

(OOC: my head hurts and I need Ibuprofen... SoCo and JEW rock! *nods* that is all)

LjKirstenDunst: Didja see my long entry?
CrazyRebelRocker: nope
CrazyRebelRocker: havenet even bothered to update
LjKirstenDunst: *nods* I see that
CrazyRebelRocker: its pointless
LjKirstenDunst: If you see it to be
CrazyRebelRocker: there's nothing happening
LjKirstenDunst: I wouldn't know
CrazyRebelRocker: *shrugs*
LjKirstenDunst: Don't the mike's see you aren't yourself?
CrazyRebelRocker: nope. i am a machine that must keep going
LjKirstenDunst: *looks down* That sucks
CrazyRebelRocker: yup.
LjKirstenDunst: I really wish I could do something, but I don't know what
CrazyRebelRocker: There is nothing you can do
LjKirstenDunst: I'm sorry sweetie
CrazyRebelRocker: Don't worry about it
LjKirstenDunst: But I have to
LjKirstenDunst: Well I don't have to
LjKirstenDunst: But I do
CrazyRebelRocker: You shouldnt have to worry
LjKirstenDunst: I don't have to, I do on my own
CrazyRebelRocker: You deserve better Kirsten
LjKirstenDunst: *drops jaw* What did you say?
CrazyRebelRocker: You deserve better than me
LjKirstenDunst: No, no I don't. I love you with all my heart, no one is better than you
CrazyRebelRocker: There are many better than me
LjKirstenDunst: No way
CrazyRebelRocker: Believe me Kirs.... you deserve much better.. much more than what I can give you
LjKirstenDunst: B-but ash, I love you. I've never cared for anyone as much as I care for you
CrazyRebelRocker: It isn't fair for either of us if we cant ever see the other,... you're lonely there.. the mikes AND jacob are up my ass... i mean come on
LjKirstenDunst: I don't know what to say
CrazyRebelRocker: I don't want to see you like this
LjKirstenDunst: Like what?
CrazyRebelRocker: you're all sad and lonely
LjKirstenDunst: I'm not sad, and I get used to the lonely part, i've lived with it forever
CrazyRebelRocker: BHut what about never seeing me...
CrazyRebelRocker: *But
LjKirstenDunst: If.....if you want to break up...just come out and say it. I don't want to drag this along...*looks down*
CrazyRebelRocker: I don't... not at all.. but I think you do deserve more than me and what I can give you
LjKirstenDunst: Then what are you saying
LjKirstenDunst: what can we do about this to make it better
CrazyRebelRocker: I...i dunno..
LjKirstenDunst: I wouldn't be happy with anyone else
LjKirstenDunst: No one in the world makes me as happy as you do ash
CrazyRebelRocker: *sighs*
LjKirstenDunst: *looks down* I'm...gonna go try to get some sleep
LjKirstenDunst: A-are we okay for now?
CrazyRebelRocker: Kirs....
CrazyRebelRocker: baby... I love you..
LjKirstenDunst: I love you more Ash, more than you know
*******

*sigh* I'm going to bed.... goodnight...

~Ashley~

SIGHS

Mon, 01 Apr 2002 17:22:42 GMT

I'm so worried about Kirs right now, it's not even funny. I miss her so much, and she misses me. And her most recent update kinda scares me. She's so sad. I want to back up but I can't because of practice and I can't miss any more of it. The Mikes surely would have my head. Nor could she come down here. After what happened last time... she wouldn't dare come back. Back to practice. The Mikes are hovering.

Be on later.

~Ash~

I'M HOME!!!!!

Sun, 31 Mar 2002 04:14:07 GMT

*worships room* *kisses bed* I'm home! I'm home! I'm HOME!!!!!! I'm gonna go shower and love on my bed. My big ass bed. I've decided. I'm taking over Jacob's SN so make sure to IM me on CrazyRebelRocker
*nods* mine is boring..anyway.. time to go sing in the shower.

Noah aka Tpyos ana Monkey Man - Hey man! Too bad I can't come harass you anymore. But you gotta come down here sometime. Seriously! Orlando is great!

Kirs - Hey I'm sorry I didn't get to say good bye before I left... I'll call you soon.

That is all!

Night,
Ashy

smiles a little so... we're better I hope...

Fri, 29 Mar 2002 04:05:08 GMT

Kirsten and I talked today. And I felt so bad. I feel like the worst boyfriend ever... Even after talking to her I still do.

She doesn't know how much she means to me. But everything reminds her of her ex Tim. The fact that I am bi REALLY doesn't help much either. I'm sorry I didn't tell her sooner. But I can't help what God makes me feel for both sexes. *shrugs* There is no changing that. And I'm not afriad to admit it. Yes, I like guys. But Kirst is my world right now. And i love her. . .

Sweetness

If you're listening.
Sing it back.
String from your tether unwinds.
Up and outward (but only) to bind.
I was spinning free with a little sweet and simple numbing me.
Are you listening?
Sing it back.
So tell me what do I need when the words lose their meaning.
I was spinning free with a little sweet and simple numbing me.
Yeah, stumble until you crawl.
Sinking into sweet uncertainty.
If you're listening.
Are you listening?
Sing it back.
I'm still running away.
I won't play your hide and seek game.
I was spinning free with a little sweet and simple numbing me.
What a dizzy dance.
This sweetness will not be concerned with me.
No the sweetness will not be concerned with.

I love JEW.. *nods* But I love Kirst more!

that is all.

~Ash~

Well, it's out... shrugs

Wed, 27 Mar 2002 23:07:39 GMT

(OOC: Yeah yeah yeah, you all know I'm Jake too.... so here this might explain the rest of it.

LjKirstenDunst: Jake!
CrazyRebelRocker: hey.
LjKirstenDunst: How are you?
CrazyRebelRocker: I'm good
LjKirstenDunst: That's good
LjKirstenDunst: Miss Ash yet?
LjKirstenDunst: I've taken him from you guys for a week *evil giggle*
CrazyRebelRocker: I'm too busy.. sides.. I hear he's spent the last two night hanging with Noah Bastian
LjKirstenDunst: Yeah, nights but he's been around here during the day
CrazyRebelRocker: heh.... you know... I don't think you know something about him...that you really should know
LjKirstenDunst: Okay?....
CrazyRebelRocker: Want to know?
LjKirstenDunst: Yessir
CrazyRebelRocker: ashley is.... bi.
CrazyRebelRocker: ...Kirsten?
LjKirstenDunst: Yeah?
CrazyRebelRocker: did you get what I said?
LjKirstenDunst: Okay...yeah...a little shock there
LjKirstenDunst: *nods*
CrazyRebelRocker: Well... here's another shock
LjKirstenDunst: *looks down, putting head in hands* What is it with me, am I not good enough for him that he needs a guy or something?
LjKirstenDunst: *sighs*
LjKirstenDunst: I told him....no I promised him I wouldn't hurt him
CrazyRebelRocker: ...I.....I uh... was ashleys boyfriend for a little while... but I've gon straight... and I don't know about him.... but I think He's still half crooked
LjKirstenDunst: *nods a little*)

Hey... well... here....

CrazyRebelRocker: Hey Kirs
LjKirstenDunst: Hey Ash
CrazyRebelRocker: whatcha doin?
LjKirstenDunst: Where were you last night, I thought you'd come home earlier *sits down* Oh, I'm not doing anything really
CrazyRebelRocker: I was with Noah again... why?
LjKirstenDunst: I was just wondering
CrazyRebelRocker: okay...
LjKirstenDunst: You weren't home til later, and I was honestly just wondering
CrazyRebelRocker: what's up with you.. something wrong?
CrazyRebelRocker: Kirs?
LjKirstenDunst: Hmm?
CrazyRebelRocker: You seem upset.. what's wrong?
LjKirstenDunst: No, I'm fine
LjKirstenDunst: Really, just a bit cranky *shrugs*
CrazyRebelRocker: Why... you can tell me anything..
LjKirstenDunst: I know...
CrazyRebelRocker: Kirsten.. you're hiding something
LjKirstenDunst: It's nothing, don't worry about it
LjKirstenDunst: I need to talk to Tim where the hell is that boy when I need him
LjKirstenDunst: No I'm not, I'd tell you, really I would
CrazyRebelRocker: KIRSTEN. Something is wrong. I know... i can feel it
LjKirstenDunst: *looks away*
LjKirstenDunst: *whispers* I never knew you were bi
CrazyRebelRocker: *drops head* let me guess, jacob told you?
LjKirstenDunst: *nods*
LjKirstenDunst: He said I should know, which I should
CrazyRebelRocker: I was going to tell you... actually I was thniking of telling you today...
LjKirstenDunst: *nods* I see
LjKirstenDunst: You weren't.....doing anything with Noah were you?
LjKirstenDunst: Please be honest
CrazyRebelRocker: No!
LjKirstenDunst: Yeah
LjKirstenDunst: *looks down*
LjKirstenDunst: I just never knew, that's all
CrazyRebelRocker: I admit.. Noah looks REALLY good. and he knows it...but Kirs...
LjKirstenDunst: *shuts eyes tightly* Yes?
LjKirstenDunst: *still hanging head*
CrazyRebelRocker: I....I..
LjKirstenDunst: What is it Ash?
CrazyRebelRocker: I.....like you... A LOT...
LjKirstenDunst: *nods* I know I know
CrazyRebelRocker: but....
LjKirstenDunst: But what?
CrazyRebelRocker: I....I really don't know how to say this...
LjKirstenDunst: Me either
CrazyRebelRocker: I uh...being bi I like both sexes... and I...I swing... more towards the guys
LjKirstenDunst: I knew this would happen, it's me and I know it
LjKirstenDunst: If you want to break up, just say it, I don't want you to be with me just because I love you and I promised not to hurt you and.....
CrazyRebelRocker: Kirsten...! I have to tell you one more thing before you decide if you ever want to hate me or not...
LjKirstenDunst: I wouldn't ever hate you Ash
CrazyRebelRocker: Kirs... I... I love you...
LjKirstenDunst: *looks up into your eyes*
LjKirstenDunst: I love you too Ash
CrazyRebelRocker: *smiles a little
LjKirstenDunst: I'd never hurt you Ash
CrazyRebelRocker: I don't want to hurt you either... and I'm kind of scared
LjKirstenDunst: Of what?
CrazyRebelRocker: That my mind might control me... and that I would hurt you
LjKirstenDunst: If you do, it's okay, be with who you want to
LjKirstenDunst: I have to go...
LjKirstenDunst: I'll talk to you later
******
You all knew I was bi before so don't let this come as much of a shock to you... I'll be on later..

~Ash~

Mon, 25 Mar 2002 11:43:48 GMT

All ducks aren't sweet and innocent and you prove that. You have a nasty streak.

Find your inner rubber ducky.

Me the DEVIL?!? I think not. Anyway... I felt like doing that. See ya later!

~Ashy~

L,.A. is sure not Florida

Fri, 22 Mar 2002 02:56:42 GMT

After the....events yesterday... Kirsten has gone back LA and I have accompanied her for a week. She's really upset. I don't like seeing her like that. Hopefully home will be good for her. I am praying the guys aren't too mad. I gotta go now!

(I hear APA is back? Is this true?)

~Ash~

This is my update

Sun, 17 Mar 2002 15:01:10 GMT

*nods*

~Ashers~

This is my update

Sun, 17 Mar 2002 14:58:46 GMT

*nods*

~Ashers~

yawns Morning

Sat, 16 Mar 2002 12:38:35 GMT

I haven't updated in a few days. I've been too drained from practice. I probably haven't been on too much. Jacob's sick. Janie's injured and I'm about to fall over. Isn't life grand? *rolls eyes*

And there goes my update.

~Ashers~

yawns Morning

Sat, 16 Mar 2002 12:37:33 GMT

Sighs

Fri, 15 Mar 2002 03:08:53 GMT

Jake's REALLY getting on my nerves. He needs to breathe or something. He's really sick and has been taking it all out on me. Is it MY fault that he's sick? Just 'cause I'm happy and he's not.... ugh... stupid... I'm gonna go now... I'm exhausted...

~Ashes~

Why do I....

Wed, 13 Mar 2002 11:23:09 GMT

Feel like running around singing?
Know I'm going to be able to focus on practice?
Want to go into Kirsten's room just to look at her?

Because last night, we finally decided, after much confusion and talking, to be together.

Kirsten - Hey I'll talk to you when I get home from practice!

To Kirsten

Tue, 12 Mar 2002 11:20:34 GMT

I'm sorry... about last night.... I'll talk to you later.

~Ash~

To Kirsten

Tue, 12 Mar 2002 11:18:22 GMT

I'm sorry... about last night.... I'll talk to you later.

~Ash~

OOC: No, I'm not complaining or whining. This is just the truth.

Sun, 10 Mar 2002 14:23:21 GMT

(Look, most of the people I talk to on LJ are pretty nice I must admit. But then there are you for a reason unknown to myself that you decide to bitch at me OOC. So I' might complain a bit. The whole population of this earth complains. Yet a few of you have taken a strong disliking to me.

FEH

Fri, 08 Mar 2002 01:25:31 GMT

(OOC: I'm keeping my charry for now.... just please pay attention to him *begs* pleeeeeasssssssse!!!!)

SessyShelli: hey
LJ Ashley Angel: hey...
SessyShelli: how you doing?
LJ Ashley Angel: im okay
LJ Ashley Angel: how about you?
SessyShelli: good to hear. i have to talk to you..
SessyShelli: eh, been better.
LJ Ashley Angel: yea...?
SessyShelli: I don't think we should be together anymore. I'm really sucking at keeping a relationship. I'm sorry Ash.
LJ Ashley Angel: *blinks* you what?
SessyShelli: I just, I'm... not giving my all to this when I should be
LJ Ashley Angel: *hangs head* oh...
SessyShelli: I'm sorry Ash. You know I'll always love you.
LJ Ashley Angel: Yeah, I know....
SessyShelli: alot of stuff has been happenin and stuff
LJ Ashley Angel: Oh.

OOC

Thu, 07 Mar 2002 21:47:30 GMT

(Alright, I have had it up to here with this character... NOTHING HAS FUCKING HAPPENED! Atleast some stuff happens with my Jake role. Now that"Shelli" is leaving. I am offering this to anyone. Unless you ACUTALLY want me to stay...*DIES* who am i kidding. no one pays attention to poor little Ash anyway. I guess you can IM Otownsgrly or CrazyRebelRocker to say if you want it or what not. I'm out....)

Yes,I live...

Wed, 06 Mar 2002 22:29:08 GMT

I've haven't updated in a few days. Sorry for my laziness...Just been practicing.I haven't talked to Shelli. She's NEVER on. She has yet to update. *sighs* Call me wicked, but I'm beginning to wonder if saying yes was the wrong choice....

~Ash~

blinks okay, don't kill and/or hate me!

Sun, 03 Mar 2002 18:26:12 GMT

SessyShelli: Ashley!
LJ Ashley Angel: Hey
SessyShelli: How you doing?
LJ Ashley Angel: I'm... okay
SessyShelli: Good to hear. So Kirsten Dunst hey?
LJ Ashley Angel: She's a friend is all.
LJ Ashley Angel: It's lonely down here
SessyShelli: Ah, I see.
SessyShelli: Sorry for nto coming down.
LJ Ashley Angel: She's not really... my type I guess you'd say
SessyShelli: Heh, She seems like it.
LJ Ashley Angel: *shakes head* no... still clings to her ex
SessyShelli: The skater guy?
LJ Ashley Angel: Tim whoever the hell he is?
SessyShelli: Oh.... Tim Goebel! lol!
LJ Ashley Angel: Yeah. him
SessyShelli: So how've you been?
LJ Ashley Angel: okay i guess. Yesterdays journal entry pretty much said it al
SessyShelli: I'm sorry Ash.
LJ Ashley Angel: for what?
SessyShelli: everything that I've done, really.
LJ Ashley Angel: don't worry about that
SessyShelli: Well I'm worried about you.
LJ Ashley Angel: why worry about me?
SessyShelli: I don't know, you don't seem yourself lately.
LJ Ashley Angel: and that others you why?
SessyShelli: Because...you mean alot to me.
LJ Ashley Angel: Why? If I meant something to you, things would be different
SessyShelli: In what way?
LJ Ashley Angel: I think you know wht I mean
SessyShelli: Yeah... You've been so busy, I wanted to talk to you about it.
LJ Ashley Angel: Well, talk
SessyShelli: I miss you alot... too much actually.
LJ Ashley Angel: as do i
SessyShelli: and I still love you! don't think that has ever stopped.
LJ Ashley Angel: same here...
SessyShelli: so... what happens now? lol
LJ Ashley Angel: I dunno.. what do you think..?
SessyShelli: I don't know, eh, I want to be with you.
LJ Ashley Angel: I do too...
SessyShelli: Well this is ackward
LJ Ashley Angel: *nods*... so what does this mean?
SessyShelli: I guess.... Can we get back together?
LJ Ashley Angel: *nods*
SessyShelli: You sure?
LJ Ashley Angel: more than sure
SessyShelli: Alright, great :)
LJ Ashley Angel: *smiles* perfect

*****

*beaming* so we are back togther...

That's all for today!

~Ashy~

Ashley Angel

o0o

ell0

FEH

Ashley is very much alive.....

*shoves head under the pillow* maybe I should just suffocate myself...

*SIGHS*

I'M HOME!!!!!

*smiles a little* so... we're better I hope...

Well, it's out... *shrugs*

L,.A. is sure not Florida

This is my update

This is my update

*yawns* Morning

*yawns* Morning

*Sighs*

Why do I....

To Kirsten

To Kirsten

OOC: No, I'm not complaining or whining. This is just the truth.

FEH

OOC

Yes,I live...

*blinks* okay, don't kill and/or hate me!

shoves head under the pillow maybe I should just suffocate myself...

SIGHS

smiles a little so... we're better I hope...

Well, it's out... shrugs

yawns Morning

yawns Morning

Sighs

blinks okay, don't kill and/or hate me!